IN THE SPA INDUSTRY, YOU ARE TAKING CARE OF YOUR CLIENTS, WHO IS TAKING CARE OF YOU?
Most people would say they are good at supporting their customers, family and friends, but why are we so bad at being there for ourselves?
My dad has been in and out of the hospital since December 12th and instantly I became a care giver (my mom passed away two years ago). I had another dear friend whose daughter was in critical condition, another friend who lost her mom, I became a Grandma February 15TH so life was very full and it has been an emotional roller coaster both of joy and worry. I found myself looking after everyone else’s needs rather than looking after myself. I was having trouble concentrating, writing and doing my daily work. I teach this and here I was in the vortex of life. I had to step back and have that talk with myself about self-care, self-love and self-discipline. I had to treat myself with the consideration, love, compassion and kindness that I was showing to others. I needed to listen to the needs of my body and my mind. I spend every minute of the day with myself so I had to ask how many of those minutes were kind and supportive to myself?
Here are some agreements that I needed to refresh:
Say no
When you say ‘no’ to others, you very often say ‘yes’ to yourself. If you’re doing something for others at the expense of yourself, it is not beneficial for anyone. If you do things through obligation, it can breed resentment. I don’t mean you shouldn’t do things for others but do it in a way that supports your own wellbeing at the same time.
Set boundaries.
I set a boundary up for myself years ago and if I am asked to do something I reply “I will get back to you within 24 hours”. This gives me time to think about the situation without reacting to the situation. I can then say “no” without feeling guilty because I have thought it through. There are times when I really want to do something, however, when my schedule is too full, I will then reply “I can’t commit to that right now”.
“I promise to do more for myself than I do for others today”
In my Beating Burnout CD I talk about doing something for yourself every day. “I promise to do more for myself than I do for others today” is a promise that I made for myself. If I don’t take care of myself first, I won’t have the energy to help others. We all invest time in giving support to others when they are going through a tough time, calling a friend, listening to our customer’s problems and encouraging them. You can do this for yourself as well. It can be as simple as a bubble bath with a candle, reading a good book or going for a walk. I prefer to put myself as my first appointment of the day to make sure I don’t get caught up in the day and decide to skip out on important things that keep me grounded.
Maintain a sense of humor.
We often forget about the role of humor as a stress-buster. Being able to laugh, even if at yourself can help you put your life’s strains into perspective.
Spend quality time with friends and family.
People who meet your emotional needs through their understanding and concern help you, in turn, meet the needs of others. Hang out with people who make you happy and want the best for you.
Make time for play
After becoming a grandma over two years ago, one of the greatest joys I can experience is playing with my granddaughter. Sometimes we forget how fun it is to just have fun. It is like a breath of fresh air. We also just got a puppy and taking a break and playing with her has brought such joy to our family. Do something that is fun, it will give you so much energy.
Get enough sleep
More sleep equals more happiness, better health and improved decision-making.